If I Were A Boy

I love watching my boys play. Everything is so magical to them; listening to Little Dude's little voice as he acts out story lines and interactions with his toys makes me think back to when I was little and played with my dolls.

And the thinking back made me think a lot about myself and how I always wanted to be a boy, because the boys have so much fun!

Well, even though 20 years later I have decided it does indeed rock to be a girl, watching my sons tumble in the grass, eat dirt, get filthy, all the while getting nods of approval and "oh, boys will be boys" comments as they stumble into Grandma and Grandpa's house has made me reach for that inner kid that never left.

So today I played football with my sons, and Little Dude actually tackled me-then sat on me. I think I mostly fell because I was so surprised by the little body flying against mine that I couldn't think fast enough to get my balance; his tackle style isn't quite NFL material yet; however, it still hurt. We quickly established the rule he WAS NOT allowed to sit on or tackle JR; I think JR was mad I was curbing their fun, because then HE threw the football at my head (I was still trying to get off the ground when he threw it.) Needless to say, today we all ended up coming into Grandma and Grandpa's house pretty dirty.

It was fun to be one of the boys.

The Butterflies Fly Away

My husband and I are hugely pro-life, so we have naturally talked a few times about adding to our family someday in the future through adoption. I've read some books, I've followed blogs, and I have grilled people I know that have gone through adoption.

But honestly, I have recently realized I far underestimated the effort and work it would/will take to adopt a child. Especially an older baby/child, as I just feel like we are meant to do someday. And I'm not talking about the legal work.

And no, we aren't starting an adoption process anytime soon.

But after going through the massive screaming fits of separation anxiety JR went through for the first two weeks (straight) back here in NC, it really hit me about what adoptive parents to older babies probably go through.

I couldn't even leave the room and if any family looked at him or Heaven forbid, touched him, he'd have hysterics, which was about to give me hysterics.

I started really thinking about how we could probably expect similar behavior from an adopted child, particularly one that has been hurt, abused, or just simply in an overcrowded orphanage for far too long. I've read about how the road of trusting, bonding and settling in at home can be long and hard for your children from online adoption blogs I follow, but until going through something slightly similar, I just did not quite get it. Now I think I have a little better idea.

And in no way does it make me change my mind; adoption is still something I would love to do, but I think I have definitely realized we will need our boys to be older so we will have more one on one time to give.

Because now that JR is settled, happy, and back to his sweet little self, I am really hoping I will never, ever, endure two weeks of a screaming, hysterical young toddler clawing for my lap, while an older toddler takes advantage by trying to sneak off with my toothpaste and smear it on his bed, all while I'm trying to pee......

Meeting in Real Life

Yesterday was so fun, because I got to meet Abby and Linus from My Sweet Babboo! We met up at the Marbles Kid's Museum, here in Raleigh and had a blast. Abby is one super sweet, awesome lady with the most adorable curly haired two year old I have ever met. I am super glad we were able to coordinate a playdate and I am looking forward to getting together again in the future!

Another plus? JR didn't lose it at the museum. He was fantastic and at some points even walked away from me (though he would look back, slyly smiling, just to check on me). I think we was in love with Abby, too, because he kept wanting to share the trains at the train tables with her. And he was making his little google-y eyes that he usually reserves for getting his way.

So, not only did the kids have a great time playing and running all around, but us moms got to chat and get to know each other outside of the blog world! Super fun! I was also super relieved JR was peachy good the whole time; I really was worried about him having some meltdowns, but apparently a trip to Marbles was all he needed. If you have never been to Marbles, you simply MUST take your kid. It is $5.00/person and so long as you are out of the crawling stage, it is fantastic. We could spend a whole day there.

After Marbles, JR continued to be golden and played quite well while I tried to catch up on cleaning and laundry, not minding the least bit that I would leave the room from time to time...thank heavens!

So apparently all you need to cure separation anxiety is a trip to Marbles and a fun visit with Linus!

A Little Separation Anxiety

Since coming back from Alabama, JR has been having a bit of a hard time. Actually, a huge hard time.

Every time I leave his sight, he screams and cries and acts like the house is falling down. He follows me everywhere saying "Ma, ma, ma, MA!" Throw in some "strangers", ie neighbors and family we haven't seen in awhile, and JR is one big bundle of tears, nerves, screams and clingy-ness.

I can understand how the bigger house (vs. our apartment in AL) and family JR hasn't seen since Christmas (even Grandma, who he just saw in May) can cause some anxiety for his little world.

But for my world, it is a little annoying. And I feel really guilty admitting that to everyone, but I really do feel like I am going to go crazy. It is pretty impossible to work because JR screams to be held. Nap time? Yea, he has been screaming and fighting a nap for the past 1/2 hour now-which has been the pattern so far since coming home-and SO FAR, about the time I finally get JR to fall asleep, Little Dude gets up, making me want to tear my hair out because I have SO MUCH work to catch up on.

So, now I am off to earn some money and hopefully get a lot done.

All The Single Ladies

I'm giving all the single moms out there a huge high five.

Bill left for the airport today around 2:30pm, and I am JUST NOW getting the kids in bed (and staying in bed!) and have FINALLY found some time to get in some work.

I am so worn out; it is amazing how two little guys can run circles around me all night! I am really missing the help Bill always gives in the evenings, and our bedtime routine was not quite as fun without him there to help read stories. Even though I am very happy to be home, it is a little sad, and already a little lonely, to be here alone with the kids. But Bill will be able to be back for a weekend in two weeks and then hopefully after that it will only be a few more weeks that he has to be in AL anymore at all.

We have some fun stuff planned this week. I'm going to be meeting another mom blogger for the first time later this week for a playdate, and I am super exited about it!

One of my close friends is due to have her baby, Henry, any day now, and I am so excited to get "the call".

I am also excited to get caught up on a lot of work for my job and the house. I have high hopes of holding a yard sale in the next month. I have about a gazillion baby toys we need to weed out and pass on to other people.

Little Dude had the BEST birthday ever; it was so great seeing our friends, and watching him play with all of his friends. All the neighborhood kids have gotten so big! I'll work on getting pictures up for everyone as soon as possible. I still can't believe my little guy is 3 years old.

Happy Brithday, Little Dude!

Three years ago today, my sweet Bill and I were taking a nap, when my water broke and our lives forever changed. Our sweet Little Dude came into the world at 1:57pm.





And now, he is such a big boy at three years old.







Tomorrow we are having a party here for him, and he is so excited to have all his little friends over. And he is getting a Thomas the Train cake, which we are so excited to give him.

This World Keeps Spinning

For the last few days I have been cleaning our house, top to bottom. Cleaning things I haven't cleaned since I went through my "nesting" phases with the boys-like the baseboards. Yes, you now know that usually have dusty baseboards.

But today, I cleaned. And it seemed with each thing I cleaned, I found yet another item that needed cleaning, or fixing, or replacing.

My vacuum finally died for good, and after learning how much it was going to cost to fix, I went to Walmart to get a new one. I ended up with the Hoover Platinum Bagged Lightweight, and I am SO happy with it. Based on the fact that our old vacuum hasn't been working right since long before JR was born, it is a great feeling to see my carpets so fresh and clean.

AND our amazing neighbor fixed the hot water on our washing machine, while another gave me all the mulch from the trees they took down.

I had an amazing time simply weeding my flower garden today, shoveling mulch, and watching Little Dude with his wheel barrel and shovel "helping", while JR napped. We dug holes and played in the yard, visited with neighbors, and caught up on the latest gossip-we have a new neighbor down the street that can do carpentry work!Whooo hooo! The young man next door-who was in 8th grade when we moved here-is getting married this month! I don't know if that makes me feel old, or if I suddenly see him as older. Still thinking on that one.

I've only been home a few days, but it already feels like we never left.

Well, except for the cleaning.